Post by Deathchill on Jan 3, 2007 12:19:34 GMT -5
Do you ever wonder why things change? Do you ever think to yourself how one event set off a series of new events which, at the time, seemed so small until they created a butterfly effect; making such a huge impact.
I'm just wishing that somethings could of stayed the same. I wonder if ST never "cleaned up" Flatearth, that things would be a little different.. all the people I used to rp with would still be there.. Maybe if MXO didn't go downhill, we'd all be there too. That place truly was the best.. it truly had everything. The best rping in The Next Renaissance.. all the coolest discussions of The Matrix Universe.. and a place to request the best sigs a person could hope for.. like a swf sig d-tox made for me back then..
It's incredible... just imagine it.. I had a choice between buying Matrix Reloaded or a cd that I liked a lot.. and I chose Reloaded.. I then watched the movie and all the bonus features.. by doing so I learned of MXO, went there, and met Raven, Captain Niobe, and the rest of the gang. Then it all was like a chain reaction.. Niobe made her site and Sadria advertised Flatearth.. and everything went on from there..
I gained a best friend, lost a best friend.. and in turn gained another best friend, one that I met on Myspace but had known from before at school.. When I really think about it.. that damn movie literally changed my life..
Things come and go but they're always a result of something.. no matter how much a try to stay my same old self, people end up effecting me.. more then I realize some times..Things I used to overlook now seem so important.. in a way, that movie may have saved my life.. I'm certain I wouldn't of lived long the way I was going..
Another year goes by and I realize things are never going to be the way they were.. not on the internet or in real life.. lives get ruined and I stay stuck just watching.. like an audience watching a sad movie that never ends. Events happen, people change, and many just seem to fade away.. and I'm left here to try to figure out why things went the way they did.. everything is a result of another result.. the chain reaction never ends..
I've changed my train of thought, became more open minded about many things. Learned how to ignore pain and learned how to forgive people for horrible things. I just wonder, can people forgive me for my stupidy, or will their lives be ruined as they try to figure out what happened.
Maybe if my father had faith and pulled the trigger, things would be better. Maybe if he had never married my mom, things would be better. Maybe if my brother didn't fall onto the brick, things would be better. How is it that things have led to this? People around me seem so happy, but how? Do they just simply forget. Or do they choose not to look?
Everythings changed.. and there's no way to go back to the way things were. I guess I'm just realizing that now. I'll never get a second chance at some things. Nothing's gonna go back, my family is gonna stay splintered and I'm gonna stay here missing that farm, staring up at the stars, with my dog at my side; the happiest memory I'll never relive.
Ugh, sometimes, being eighteen isn't so fun. I'd give anything to back to just being a little kid when the worst that happened is getting in trouble for telling a lie.
I'm just wishing that somethings could of stayed the same. I wonder if ST never "cleaned up" Flatearth, that things would be a little different.. all the people I used to rp with would still be there.. Maybe if MXO didn't go downhill, we'd all be there too. That place truly was the best.. it truly had everything. The best rping in The Next Renaissance.. all the coolest discussions of The Matrix Universe.. and a place to request the best sigs a person could hope for.. like a swf sig d-tox made for me back then..
It's incredible... just imagine it.. I had a choice between buying Matrix Reloaded or a cd that I liked a lot.. and I chose Reloaded.. I then watched the movie and all the bonus features.. by doing so I learned of MXO, went there, and met Raven, Captain Niobe, and the rest of the gang. Then it all was like a chain reaction.. Niobe made her site and Sadria advertised Flatearth.. and everything went on from there..
I gained a best friend, lost a best friend.. and in turn gained another best friend, one that I met on Myspace but had known from before at school.. When I really think about it.. that damn movie literally changed my life..
Things come and go but they're always a result of something.. no matter how much a try to stay my same old self, people end up effecting me.. more then I realize some times..Things I used to overlook now seem so important.. in a way, that movie may have saved my life.. I'm certain I wouldn't of lived long the way I was going..
Another year goes by and I realize things are never going to be the way they were.. not on the internet or in real life.. lives get ruined and I stay stuck just watching.. like an audience watching a sad movie that never ends. Events happen, people change, and many just seem to fade away.. and I'm left here to try to figure out why things went the way they did.. everything is a result of another result.. the chain reaction never ends..
I've changed my train of thought, became more open minded about many things. Learned how to ignore pain and learned how to forgive people for horrible things. I just wonder, can people forgive me for my stupidy, or will their lives be ruined as they try to figure out what happened.
Maybe if my father had faith and pulled the trigger, things would be better. Maybe if he had never married my mom, things would be better. Maybe if my brother didn't fall onto the brick, things would be better. How is it that things have led to this? People around me seem so happy, but how? Do they just simply forget. Or do they choose not to look?
Everythings changed.. and there's no way to go back to the way things were. I guess I'm just realizing that now. I'll never get a second chance at some things. Nothing's gonna go back, my family is gonna stay splintered and I'm gonna stay here missing that farm, staring up at the stars, with my dog at my side; the happiest memory I'll never relive.
Ugh, sometimes, being eighteen isn't so fun. I'd give anything to back to just being a little kid when the worst that happened is getting in trouble for telling a lie.